Wednesday, February 01, 2006

All-Star Countdown: 16 Days, 8 Hrs, 14 Min...

To comemmorate the NBA All-Star festivities in Houston this year, every post from now until the All-Star Event will bear this official All-Star logo. We will also be sending our very own Church League Revelations Division All-Star, Train, to as many shitty All-Star Events as we can.

Speaking of shitty All-Star Events, The Cavalier at YAYsports! NBA has devised a revolutionary All-Star event to spice up NBA All-Star Saturday... it's quite mad and indigenous, I mean ingenuous, no, something with genius:
No more Dunk Contest tweaks, no more Skills Challenges, and no more anything-that-involves-the-WNBA. They need to trim this down to one event: The $1,000,000 NBA All-Star On-on-One Challenge. (Ours is called the YAYsports! NBA One-on-One Challenge and it's sponsored by Han Solo, but you get the idea.)
That's all that happens Saturday night - 4 rounds, games to 7. Last two rounds are to 11. Throw in some musical entertainment that isn't country music, and you've got a true basketball EVENT.

For our purposes, we've seeded the top 16 scorers in the league, although if the NBA did it, they should probably use the All-Stars themselves.
Click here for why this is truly genius. Should this be the future of NBA All-Star Weekend? Holler holler holler holler holler holler holler...

7 comments:

Jeff said...

I love the idea of the $1mil 1-on-one challenge! I think that America is getting sick of watching the same old dunks with slight variants, the (yawn) 3-point contest, and the perenially stupid rookie-sophomore game.

Another great idea I've heard is to have NBAers play HORSE. Considering that players (guards especially) can do some seriously sick shit when they're just fucking around, HORSE would give them the opportunity to showcase their most ridiculous ideas. Can you imagine the kind of stuff AI, Nash and Baron could pull off? "Left-handed, off Barkley's dome, bank 3."

train said...

so...if you are sending me does that mean you are paying for everything too? or did you want me to try and sneak into every event? keep in mind that i cant run because of the knee injury so my chances of getting caught are higher.

aloneconformist said...

just comment on the thing.

train said...

the entire day before the all-star game has become a waste of time. to be honest i'd rather watch a one-on-one tournament of allstars than the actual allstar game.

dukehogwild said...

truelly is ingeneral. i say make that the main event saturday but keep the dunk contest, but give the winner 10 million. i'm sure lebron will show up if there's 10 million cash money on the line..i'm pretty sure even vince will make a return....i had another idea that's been brewing lately. the over 40 nba retirey dunk contest..bring back the old timers and embarrass em a little. imagine jordan, drexler, spud, dr. j, tom chambers, and nique all coming out and trying to dunk. the fans would love it. we'll have this years nba dunk contestants be the judges. and then we could get houstons top strippers to give everybody lap dances....and blow jobs..then we could all go to the summit the next following morning and pray...yeh yeh, it'll be a blast! i can't wait! what an event it'll be! what a weekend!

dAGO said...

how about instead of this million dollar challenge we let the fans vote on the MVP of each conference and from there we do it old school playground style. Say for instance, AI and T-mac are chosen, they flip a coin for the first pick and then continue to add players to their squad. They can pick from either of the 2 conferences until the last player is chosen from the All-star roster. my guess would be Kobe " I'm better than you are" Bryant is the last man standing.

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