Monday, October 31, 2005

Fists of Fury... Halloween Edition

One mystery is solved... the Chinese David Bowie whirlygig dunker is neither Chinese or David Bowie. He is French-Algerian dunking showman, Ziani Kadour, of the French travelling dunk troupe Slam Nation... cut me some slack, the video was grainy. Here's more.

His "trading card" alone is the Halloween theme.

Friday, October 28, 2005

TJ's Back!!!

We've been TJ Ford fans since he was cuttin' it up, throwin' it down and knocking us out of our seats with it back in the Fort Bend Independent School District.

With two consecutive Texas 5-A State Championships, a USA Today #1, NCAA Final Four, and the 8th pick in the 2003 draft, he was kind of a hero for us--a local legend... sniffle.

But this what he looked like the last time we saw him. And it almost drove us away from basketball all together to think he might never play again.

Now he's back and so far this preseason he looks like he
hasn't missed a beat. In fact, he looks better than ever. And we're gonna follow him all season. Forget Nate Robinson, TJ's the original 5-foot-nothing with the nasty hops.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

More Fists of Fury....

Yao, he really does move in slo-motion...

Rockets preseason pic courtesy of Train Deux.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

'Stros Lose the Finals!!!

What... they played already?

Monday, October 24, 2005

Train's NBA Predictions '05-'06 Edition

Train (pictured in his natural state) out in H-Town, while not pretending to like baseball, sends his NBA predictions...

T-Mac is MVP. Rockets win bring it home... (My living in Houston is not a factor in any predictions and will not skew my judgement of the facts).

eats PHX in the Western Conf. Finals... Amare will make every player he faces in the playoffs his personal whipping boy, including Duncan and Yao... but Mac averages 50ppg in the WCFs, winning Finals MVP. Rockets bring it home...

Clippers will be the 5th seed in the West...
Seattle dismantles its team after abysmal season...

Memphis... ... ...

In the East, Lebron will--as a personal display of consistency--have a third consecutive breakout-but-not-quite-Hall-of-Fame year with the help of Larry Hughes but it will end again with no playoffs when King James fractures a cheek bone against the backboard while overextending for an alley-oop thrown by Hughes. Hughes will be vilified by the Cleveland fans and accused of a jealous scheme. He will be asked to leave the team indefinitely. Fans will ask if Lebron is cursed.

Shaq will end frontcourt mate Antoine Walker's career in a fight in retaliation to a vague Walker reference to Kobe Bryant after a tough loss... Miami never recovers...

Shaq retires and joins the Miami SWAT team... he saves the city of Miami $20,000 on battering rams and re
scue cranes the following year. Wade decides to fill Shaq's other shoes by acting.... he receives rave reviews for his performance in New Jack City 2: New Jacks vs. OGs. Dwayne Wade also retires after the '05-'06 season and moves to New York to pursue a serious acting career...

To increase ticket sales, the Carolina Bobcats... no Cincinatti... no Charlotte Hornets--Bobcats will break into song and dance after every three pointer made at home. The Horncats will release Kareem Rush and Jake Voskuhl to make way for Broadway veterans Bernadette Peters and Daphne Rubin-Vega...

Suprise teams... don't ask me how they will suprise you... good or bad, they will surprise you... Chicago, New Jersey, Golden State... maybe Portland... maybe not.

Ben Gordon, Sarunas Jasikevicius, VC, Ron-Ron, Yao and Skip will be All-Stars...

KG, Pau Gasol, Mike Bibby, and Gilbert Arenas will be on different teams next year...

That is all I see... for now.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

'Stros Reach the Finals!

The only question now is who will make Finals MVP... I think I have an idea who.

Pic courtesy of

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Duke's NBA Predictions '05-06 Edition

Three years ago Duke claims to have beat Sebastian Telfair in a game of 21 at Pratt University in Brooklyn. PSAL Champion, High School All-American, NBA or whatever, Duke will always hold that game over Bassy's head. Telfair may make millions, but Duke gets to predict his future and naysay. These are his predictions:


1. The Houston Rockets will not win their division, but they will win the NBA CHAMPIONSHIP. Period.

2. The Spurs will win 65 games and hold home court throughout the playoffs, but will get knocked out in the Western Conference Finals in Houston on game 6. Bowen will be quoted as saying, "it's hard to say this with a straight face, but I... I thought I had guarded him pretty well but..." Tracy McGrady will be FINALS MVP.

3. Lebron James will average 28.4 points 8.6 rebounds 9.2 assists 2.1 steals and 1.3 blocks per game. The Cavs (with the help of Hughes) will reach the Eastern Quarterfinals before getting knocked out by Detroit. Lebron will be awarded MVP for his trouble.

4. Mo Cheeks and Allen Iverson will have career years, leading a team of youngsters and not-so youngsters to the playoffs, before getting squashed by Dwane Wade and the Heat. Iverson will get 30+ for the season and 8+ assists. Mo will win COACH OF THE YEAR.

5. Ron-Ron and Jermaine O'neal will lead an inspired Pacers team to the Eastern Conference finals. They will beat Detroit in the Semis in the most competetive and emotional playoff series in the history of mankind. Ron-Ron will deserve DEFENSIVE PLAYER OF THE YEAR but will get snubbed... for obvious reasons. The award instead goes to Ben Wallace for no better reason.

6. During stretches of the season, the Spurs back-up guard combo of Nick Van Exel and Michael Finley play so well that Parker and Ginobili's minutes become significantly reduced (less than 24 per game). Finley wins 6th MAN OF THE YEAR by a vote over runner-up, Nick the Quick.

7. Usually when a number 2 pick comes to training camp, the coaching staff will have some kind of plan to incorporate such a player into the line up. In Donnie Darko's case, Larry Brown had another idea, an idea that would lodge Darko on the furthest reaches of the bench for two entire seasons. But now that Larry is gone and Flip is in, Darko will win MOST IMPROVED PLAYER by merely stepping onto the court.

8. In an interesting twist, Larry Brown will buck his history of shunning young players, and become a believer in Nate Robinson. He will give him minutes early in the season, not because he likes him, but to punish Stephon. After seeing the kid born in '84 run the floor, Larry falls in love and gives Nate full back-up duty, sometimes playing Starbury and "Fate" at the same time. Fate wins ROOKIE OF THE YEAR.

9. A few good years, a couple of playoff bids, a ton of talent, but no playoff victories and Fratello can kiss his ass goodbye. The Memphis Grizzlies will get the nod for MOST DISAPPOINTING TEAM in '05-06. "Jesus" is just good enough to give the runner-up Sonics just enough Ws to stay runner-up. The MOST IMPROVED TEAM will be Baron Davis' Golden State Warriors.

10. I'm personally looking forward to the All-Star break this year. It will be the sickest of all sicknessess of dunkage ever recorded on digital recording. Nate Robinson, Lebron James, Gerald Green, and last year's champ Josh Smith will battle for the crown... Bron-Bron wins by jumping from the the free throw line off one, cocking the ball back and stuffing it through with BOTH hands... which beats Gerald Green dunking with the side of his face.

These are my predictions... don't be scurred when they all come true.


Sunday, October 16, 2005

Fists of Fury... The Dwayne Wade of Osaka

No joke. In Japan, Yuta Tabuse gets the '06 NBA Live cover... so he finished '05 in ABA Long Beach, but he did sign with the Clippers this year before camp...

Monday, October 10, 2005

Nothing But the Finest Homegrown Hops

In high school, there was this AAU coach who used to stand behind the basket while we did lay-up lines and assess our jumping ability in laconic utterances. After every attempt he would say, mutter really, "no hops... no hops... no hops..." in straight deadpan one after another. We were dunking then or at least slapping the glass real hard, so we'd ask ourselves, who the fuck had hops then? This kid. This kid has "hops."

Can somebody verify this for me? Did he really do this?

Houston-born Gerald Green, no. 18 in the draft (somehow), at last year's High School All-American Slam Dunk Contest. To my Train brothers, A and L, in Sugar Land, how did you miss this guy? Can you stop talking about Hightower and Willowridge and get on the ball?

Tell me that shit is regulation. That shit ain't regulation...

Sunday, October 09, 2005

Sun's Surgery a Success... No, Not That One

Not Amare... though also a success... Press Release for Sun Ming Ming's recent surgery...

7’8 Basketball Player Sun Ming Ming has Successful Surgery to Remove a Tumor on His Pituitary Gland

NBA hopeful Sun Ming Ming, a 7-foot-8-inch center from China, underwent revolutionary surgery Monday, September 26 to correct a potentially fatal disorder at Cedars Sinai Hospital in Los Angeles.

(PRWEB) September 30, 2005 -- Dr. Hrayr Shahinian of the Skull Base Institute in Los Angeles performed surgery on Ming in which a tumor on Ming’s pituitary gland was removed. The tumor, which was discovered in June, was causing Ming’s pituitary gland to over produce the growth hormone and severely decrease his endurance and stamina levels.

Dr. Shahinian expects Ming to resume his basketball career after short recovery and is confident Ming’s strength, stamina and endurance levels will show dramatic improvements.

“Sun Ming Ming is well on his way to achieve his dreams and aspirations," Shahinian said. “Monday’s surgery was a monumental milestone for him and he will see dramatic, positive results once he begins his basketball workouts. It is a testament to many people that a young man from a very poor province in rural China can come to the United States and receive innovative surgery that is not available in many countries."

Dr. Shahinian has earned worldwide acclaim for developing the complicated procedure with minimal risk factors and a greatly reduced recovery time over more traditional approaches to brain surgery.

Ming’s surgery was subsidized by donations and fundraisers. Ming is not currently with an NBA team and has no medical insurance.

“This surgery could not have been performed without the donations and efforts of many people in the United States, including Dr. Shahinian." said Ming’s agent, Charles Bonsignore of Passing Lane Sports. “I cannot say enough good things about Dr. Shahinian and his willingness to help."

Ming was released from the hospital on September 28th and is expected to return to the basketball court in three weeks.

“I want to thank everyone for caring about me and saving my life," Ming said. “I will always endeavor to give back to people and work hard to achieve my goals. I am excited to get back on the basketball court."

Fundraising is still ongoing to cover Ming’s medical costs. Checks can be sent directly to Sun Ming Ming at 9452 Telephone Road, #131, Ventura, CA 93004.

Bocce ball anyone?

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Skip Joins the Rockets

Rockets finally get a playmaker at the point. Marriage made in heaven far as I'm concerned. A dream come true for him...

Skip's on a contender for once. With T-Mac, Yao, Stro and D.A., he's gonna have plenty of finishers and
a lot of open looks. This is his chance once and for all to prove if he's legit. So, can he still knock 'em down? Miami showed that he could. If only he could forget Toronto.

Regardless, it should be fun to watch. Skip's always been the people's champ. And Paul Wall's just around the corner.

Raptors trade Alston to Rockets for James (10/3, AP)