Thursday, May 04, 2006

The Playoff Hustle: Raja Bell is Luke Skywalker

Thursday! Thursday! Thursday! In Los Angeles! Suns-Lakers Cage Match! 10 men enter! One man leaves! There can only be one Highlander!

Last match, Raja "Pretty Boy" Bell performed a vicious, bloodcurdling clothesline off the ropes on The Black Mamba! Nearly topped by a botched James "Earl Gray" Jones DDT on Kwame "Pass the Butter" Brown!

Pretty Boy Suspended! Mamba unflappable! Blames it on way Pretty Boy was raised! Pretty Boy says Mamba's not his Father! Reporter misses Kobe's overcompensating allusion to Missing Hugs! Genitals bumped! Shoulders dusted! Round 2 Tonight! In the Staples Center! Be there!

Dare we say it? I'm just going to say it... this is the best f'ing first round of the playoffs ever. Ever. The ESPN writers weigh in but they're non-committal. I'm saying it:

Best F'ing National Basketball Association Playoffs First Round Ever.

"Pretty Boy" Bell clothesine pics by AP.

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